Learning so much....but what again?

NOTE: I present a lot of questions in this entry--this does NOT IMPLY that if I question something or someone, I believe them to be wrong--it's because I want to know IF they are or are not.

A traveling couple I had an extremely brief exchange with in Goodman, WI invited me to stay at their home in Green Bay. Since the Packers are my second favorite team, I had to say yes! First, let me talk about Michigan.

I visited a friend in a Detroit suburb. It was so WONDERFUL to connect with someone my own age!! It seems like those I really get along the best are usually 30 to 50 years older than I am which honestly, is a bit saddening to me. Why don't young people like to DISCUSS the meaning of life? I just had such a GREAT time there. She introduced me to her neighbors who were just wonderful women as well. We stayed up "late" drinking wine and discussing all the things people aren't supposed to talk about: religion, sex, and politics. If you can leave the night having different views on these subjects and still be friends, you're in good company!

One thing I noticed is the South is not as racist as we make it out to be. Ok, let me rephrase that. The South is just as racist as the rest of the country. I noticed just as much segregation in Michigan as in Georgia. I feel the racism in the north, which I considered to be only a Seattle thing, is that no one believes themselves to be racist as probably a Southerner might admit it more. And how can you solve a problem that no one believes exists? I am very curious to look up the history of Detroit now. My friend said that she's talked to people who have lived in the Detroit suburbs their whole lives and how in the 1960's, after the riots, the white people gave up the city to the African American population and it's gone downhill ever since. I asked her, "If you listened to the same story from people who lived in Atlanta suburbs their whole lives, would you believe them or would you write it off as 'those southern racists'?" I REALLY wish I would have been able to go in the city and talk to people. Would I just pin everyone in the city of Detroit as a victim? Probably not. I think to completely victimize people strips them of their power to help themselves. Grr--this has left me with TOO many questions and NOT enough answers!

Continuing on the topic of the Midwest, never has any group of people been so generous to me as those in Michigan and Wisconsin. Southerners were very hospitable and would invite me to their house, some would even buy me dinner. No one handed me cash, but I swear Midwesterners have just been throwing money at me. Obviously it's not a huge amount but it's been very touching and amazing to me.

My interviews in Goodman, WI went very well. It was the first time that I actually went to people's houses to interview people, and my first time to interview the oldest person in the town (she is 96 years old). One man, in his 90's, answered very high on his level of happiness. However, on the other factors that should contribute to happiness, he was very low. At the end of the survey when he started showering me with little gifts, I asked him, "Why are you so happy? Everything here states that you shouldn't be so." (I always seem to just blurt out what I'm thinking--gets me in trouble sometimes) He had lost two wives, one fairly recently, and his 11...yes ELEVEN...children all lived a fair distance away from him and he lived alone in a retirement community. After thinking about it for a moment, he had simple answer: "The Lord has been very good to me." Goodman is at the edge of its county, connected closely with Franklin county. This is the poorest county in the state. However, 4 separate people tried handing me money and gifts. Another bought my dinner at the cafe.

When I was in New Hampshire, I decided to splurge and buy dinner out to eat famous New England seafood. I sat down at the bar next to a CEO who had traveled the world and the country many times over. He was definitely well off. Now, I am hesitant to repeat this in words because I don't want to make it sound like I am looking for hand outs. He made no mention of buying me dinner, which actually was probably the first time that I had sat down and chatted with someone who hadn't. When I was in the south, I wouldn't find out until after they had left that they had paid so there was no way I could thank them. Those in the poorest county in the state were giving me the shirt off their back. Again, I wasn't looking for ANYONE to buy me anything. Thank the Lord people have been so good to me. Despite my rest stop showers, going extra slow on the freeway to save gas, and lunches consisting of tuna and crackers, I am starting to run out of money. If people hadn't been so GOOD to me along the way and before I even started my journey, there is no way I could have done this trip. It just cost so much more than I thought.

The couple from Green Bay showered me with typical generosity to a complete stranger. The husband and I sat down and he just started asking me over and over again how I was doing things. He said that it seems like the surveys and interviews are secondary to this amazing journey I've had. In many ways, I have felt very much like what it's like to be homeless, he commented. Obviously I have a car and I do have emergency money so it's not the same. I told him I feel like I'm learning something very important but I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS. Every day I talk to people and gain experiences and hear viewpoints I had never heard before. Then I get back into my car and digest it all. But I don't know what I'm digesting! Once I do figure out what I'm learning, I think it's going to be pretty intense. And once I understand that, where do I go from there?

The more I travel, the more I find out I really don't have an idea of what it is like to live in this earth. The less likely I am just to say 'well, these people are this way' as I did when I was younger. The scary part of it is, I have seen more places and talked to and tried to understand the people of this world more than the majority of people...and how LITTLE we understand each other and really see what it's like. Especially since the more you learn, the more you realize you have more to learn. I was given such a tiny snapshot of American life growing up. I traveled the world and the view got bigger. As the pinhole of my experience expanded, the more I could see it was just a small piece of a much larger picture. What I find sad is that when people don't travel or try to understand their neighbor, they feel like they understand each other because they don't realize their life is just a tiny fraction of the human experience. There is so much more to learn.

I'm in Illinois now. Yesterday I came down with a nasty cold--worse than I've had in a long time. Thankfully a friend from Everett hooked me up with more of his family in Bloomington so I was able to sleep 14 hours last night. Even so, there will be no surveys today. Also, to those who keep on telling me, "Amazing you haven't had car problems yet" STOP SAYING THAT. I've had to deal with 3 ever since people made that stupid comment :D Gotta go pretty soon to throw down a couple hundred more on a brake problem because apparently brakes are important...whatever. Again THANK you to everyone who's helped me out. I haven't had to panhandle at all because of you!!

Amish Gone Wild

"I like your beard." I said to a man dressed in a jump suit with short hair and wearing no hat. He gave me an odd look as two toddler boys in blue suits and straw hats ran to his side. Oh. Yup, observant Stephanie just complimented an Amish man on his beard. He was camouflaged though, how was I supposed to know he was Amish?? I interviewed the majority of Pike and Hume, NY, included several Amish youth too. The vibe between the Englishers and the Old Order was very different than up north by Canada. Up north, the Amish seemed much shyer, traditional, and friendly. The English had great things to say about their neighbors and people hung out together pretty often. Here, they lived just as close in proximity but there was more tension between the groups. I sat in a barber shop in Pike where the people were talking about their Amish neighbors
"I just saw a group of Amish walk by."
"Were they staggering? Are they drunk already?"
That is NOT the first question I would ask about any group, traditional or non, about those walking at 5 o clock in the evening on a Thursday night. She then went on to tell the story how recently, a horse and buggy was getting stopped by the police for a DWI. The driver, in drunken logic, spurred his horse on faster to try to outrun the cops and when he realized it could not be done, he jumped out of his buggy and ran into the woods. Apparently the Amish around this area, who even hire drivers to go the post office, are not nearly as traditional and have a secret love for booze. Amazing.

I realized this trend of dissolving traditional values first hand when I doing interviews with young Amish who were buying Doritos and energy drinks at a gas station. I never thought I would be chatting with an Amish boy my age drinking a Monster talking about working construction. The girls just giggled and chatted in Pennsylvanian Dutch. I answered their questions in German they were asking each other about the survey and they looked at me with wide eyes and giggled some more. Strange, I thought the girls would be more comfortable to talk to me but I only chatted with female Amish a couple of times but I talked to a dozen Amish men.

That night I took side roads in Ohio and sure enough, I drove passed an Amish school. There's nothing cuter than little Amish boys and girls running and playing tag in straw hats and bonnets. A little later, I drove by a local store and saw a few horse and buggies tied up. Long story short, after I asked to take a picture of a man's horse and buggy, he offered to give me a ride. "You won't be too scared will you?" "Um, NO!!"

It was awesome. Totally made my year. Turns out all these talks and hanging out with Amish and even getting a buggy ride doesn't really happen too often. People are pretty surprised when I tell them I've interviewed a dozen Amish, "And they'll talk to you?" they reply. I guess so!

I apologize for this blog entry. I am pretty sure I have fully come down with a cold. My brain is clogged up so it's not working so great. I think I just spaced off at the computer screen for a full 5 minutes before I remembered what I was doing.

So many thoughts since I've been in the Midwest, continuing on ideas of racism, poverty, generosity, and purpose. Sadly this is my first chance at blogging in almost a week. I should have time tomorrow and hopefully my brain will be working by then. Well, as much as it ever is.